✨ When we place our center outside ourselves — in what others think of us — it is as if we hand the steering of our inner life into someone else’s hands. And the body senses this very well.
As a body-oriented psychotherapist, I often see how a person gradually begins to drift away from themselves. At first very subtly. Instead of “What do I feel?” comes the question “How do I look in the eyes of others?”. Instead of “What do I want?” — “What will be accepted?”.
And then several things happen — not only psychologically, but also in the body.
📍 First, constant tension appears.
The body starts to live in a mode of watching and control. The shoulders tighten, breathing becomes shallow, the jaw clenches. As if there is a little inner overseer inside, constantly checking: “Am I behaving well? Do they like me?”
📍 Then comes the fatigue of playing roles.
When the center is outside, a person begins to adapt to every environment. A little different with some people, a little different with others. This is exhausting, because the body senses there is no stable place where it can simply be.
📍 And gradually a quiet sense of emptiness appears.
Not because life is empty, but because the connection with one’s own feelings has weakened. Sometimes people say:
“Everything in my life is fine, but I don’t feel truly alive.”
From a body-oriented point of view, this is the moment when the inner center has been lost.
But there is a very gentle truth here: no one loses their center forever. It simply hides.
When a person begins to turn inward again — toward the body, toward the breath, toward the simple question “What am I feeling right now?” — a return gradually takes place.
✨ The body relaxes.
The breath deepens.
Decisions become quieter, but more genuine.
And then the relationship to others’ opinions changes too. It is no longer the compass of your life. It is simply information.
And the compass is inside once more.
And do you know what is most beautiful? When a person returns to their center, they actually become more genuinely connected to others, not more separate. Because they no longer relate through roles, but through presence.
📍 Part 2 follows.
Krasimira Koleva 💫 Психолог и психотелесен терапевт ← Обратно към блога